A Lifelong Horror Addict (a shocking confession too!)

by Tyler
(Soldotna, AK, USA)

When I became an addict I wasn't old enough to go to school, I was about 3 or 4 when my older sister (that b*tch, saint) wrapped her arms around my little body, possible for comfort, as she made me watch the first 4 Freddy flicks. I cried until my tear making skills died, which was around the time that Johnny Depp got sucked into his bed... from there my taste and ungodly need to blood made me insane.

However, it was too late... I was hooked before I could talk and Damien before kindergarten and any and every horror film found its way to me. I even got kicked out of pre-school for tying an airplane blanket around my neck and acting like Dracula. Sadly, my young mind didn't know that vampires were fake and I slid down the plastic slide in the play room head first after a kid with a bloody nose bled all over it... yeah! But I never did that again, it tasted nasty, but mostly because my mom insured that vampire movies weren't in my life until I reached age 12.

TODAY... I am 22 and still hooked.

I'm so hooked that I have predicted films, in the theater on opening night, even the non horror films. A few years ago, my date for the film Collateral was amazed that I knew before the first ten minutes the entire films we watched, she was so amazed, she even took me to several more films with her chick friends just so they could witness the freak show that I was, with them, I predicted films I had no reason to see, like Chicago! Chicago! It was not my finest moment, but never the less... I was spot on and correct with every prediction. And I even got laid cause of it, still... Chicago!

I'm no longer scared at horror films. The only time I wigged out in my entire life watching one, besides my first three years watching films after school, was the final five minutes of the first Saw when Jigsaw got up, but only for a moment. The honey I took to that had me walk her home, because I had time to calculate the odds of being abducted on the way home and made the mistake of sharing them with her. I told her the odds were low, but she said tell that to Dr. Gorden and Adam! So I walked her home and left her safely at her house. never mind the fact that Adam was abducted at home in the film.

I own every Saw film now. Today that I don't rent at my local video store because I've gone from A-Z in the realms of the horror section, thriller and mystery sections too. Nope, I don't rent, I buy! And to me, Halloween at Walmart is like Christmas because they get DVDs by the truck load and I have a wall sized DVD rack just for my slasher films. I read books, scripts, comics, buy memorabilia, and listen to a lot of Rob Zombie because it all goes back to the movies...

My friends ask me if they should see the newest horror movie and I tell them that today's horror films are mostly remakes, reboots, prequels, and movies made by horror fans like Eli Roth... so yeah, sure go see them, I'll go too. After all, imitation is the bloodiest form of flattery. Oh and I don't drink blood anymore, it isn't as cool as it looks. At the theater, when asked what I want to drink with my popcorn, I've never had to go: "Fountain drink type O plasma? No thanks, I'll take a large coke though!"

These movies are my lifeline and I'll probably never kick my habit... I'm happy in Horrorland!