Abominable Displays Every Element of Good Horror.
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Abominable shows us that a horror movie can have good actors, a scary monster, impressive gore AND nubile lovelies, and still fall flat.
Review by BHM Editor The Horror Czar
October 8, 2006
Buy on Amazon
Movie Release: 2006
Written and Directed by: Ryan Schifrin
Starring:
Matt McCoy as Preston Rogers
Haley Joel as Amanda
Christien Tinsley as Otis Wilhelm
Lance Henriksen as Ziegler Dane
Jeffrey Combs as Buddy, the Clerk
Dee Wallace-Stone as Ethel Hoss
A good horror movie is more than the sum of its parts. Case in point: Abominable. The elements are all there, including great horror actors, scary blood-thirsty monster, a cabin in the woods filled with nubile young lovelies, jumps and scares and impressive gore. Still, the finished product is not quite there.
The story starts us out by introducing us to Farmer Hoss (Rex Linn) and his wife Ethel (Dee Wallace-Stone of Cujo and The Howling). There is some kind of ruckus outside upsetting the livestock, and ole’ Farmer Hoss is planning on taking care of the problem with his trusty shot gun.
Well, whatever it is that was causing such a commotion is more than one farming couple with a gun can handle, because the damage to the horses is very extreme. They run frantically to the house and listen in dread as something huge circles the house and peers in their windows. When it is finally gone they go outside to investigate and discover enormous footprints in the snow.
News of the wild hairy hooligan spreads through town, and Farmer Hoss enlists some of his buddies (including horror favorite Lance Henriksen and genre great Jeffrey Combs from Re-Animator) to roam the countryside in search of this brutal beast.
Meanwhile Preston Rogers (Matt McCoy) is returning to the area accompanied by his trusty nurse Otis. Six months ago Preston was in a terrible climbing accident that left his wife dead and him in a wheelchair…and his doctors think returning to the scene of the accident to his log cabin will be good therapy. Amazingly, although the cabin is in the middle of the woods at the end of a very long and winding road, there is another 
house right next door. (I mean right next door – within feet.) A bevy of young beauties have rented this house for the weekend, and love to do things like shower and caress their bodies in front of the open windows. Lucky Preston!
Not so lucky when the mangy marauder from the farmhouse massacre decides that livestock is no longer enough to curb his voracious hunger, and sets his sites on the tender flesh of the young maidens and on Preston himself!
The casting for this film was good, especially with both Dee Wallace and Lance Henriksen, two of my favorites. Unfortunately the bonus for the casting director is withdrawn with the inclusion of star Matt McCoy. Not sure if it was the script or his acting, but the jumpy scaredy-pants mixed with dirty old man and monologue-rich soap-boxer just wasn’t working for me.
The monster was both great and absolutely terrible. He was scary and all, as long as you didn’t get too close a look at him. Unfortunately Abominable makes sure that we DO get a close look at him…and it reminded me of a fake gorilla with green fur that wears a neck-tie and Uncle Sam hat outside of a local carwash in Atlanta.
Nubile lovelies are always a nice addition to a horror movie, and this film is no exception. Unfortunately none of them really stood out as a formidable foe to the creature. Where is Laurie Strode when you need her?
The jumps, scares and gore were all first-rate. There is even a great scene where Otis the nurse (Christien Tinsley) calls the creature “Ass Monkey” that was really funny…but it wasn’t enough.
Abominable is one of those movies that could have a fantastic trailer, because there are some really good and scary moments. There are some excellent gore scenes also, at least one of which I want to see again. (Think “monster bites someone’s face off”…) Unfortunately to see the cool scenes you have to watch all the rest of it.
For it’s good points Abominable is worth watching. Since I bought the DVD I will certainly watch it again for the action, the gore and the “Ass Monkey”. Questions or comments about Abominable? Discuss it on The Ossuary Forums!
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