Dear Zombie Master: Genetic Science and Zombies

by Matt Lolcake
(St. Louis, Misouri, USA)

Dear Zombie Master,

When the scientists start bringing dead cells back to life at a more progressive rate, it is rumored to be possible for a dead human to be brought back to life. Or at least some functions like the brain and the muscles. Possibly the cells would be able to evolve into a virus.

If so, will zombies be able to function like us? Walking, running, jumping? Or will they just be vegetables?

Thanks,
Matt

Matt,

First, for those out there that think you are not being serious in your question I would like to recommend this link for them to begin there search:


http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/2006/sep/24/highereducation.research

Second, to answer your question, I just don't know. One thing that I do know though is that when scientists start playing God, especially with genetics, it usually ends up bad. If history teaches us anything, they will more than likely come up with either a mutation or virus that will not be contained properly, and will get out to the greater population and start killing people. Within a time period between 6 hours and 2 days, these people will begin to reanimate and they will be hungry. They will begin attacking the living, some will be eaten outright and others will just be wounded. The wounded will eventually die and then reanimate thus creating more zombies at a drastic rate in which the majority of the population will be infected within a matter of months. If it is not caught in time and a quarantine is not imposed then someone from the host nation will get into another nation and it will be a world wide pandemic that will only be stopped by those select few that have prepared for the inevitable. We will then wait it out and start taking back our world one zombie at a time.

Of course, this is all speculation.

Good hunting and aim high,

The Zombie Master