Demon Divas and the Lanes of Damnation is a Fun but Flawed 80s Throwback
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Demon Divas and the Lanes of Damnation is an entertaining homage to 80s scream queen horror. Its low-budget origins hurt it on a technical level, but it’s still worth a look.
Written by James “Crypticpsych” Lasome
March 27, 2011
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Release: April 3, 2009 (USA), April 5, 2011 (US DVD)
Directed by: Mike Watt
Written by: Mike Watt
Starring:
Brinke Stevens as Morgan/Morrigan
Debbie Rochon as Natalie/Nemain
Amy Lynn Best as Crystal/Lamia
Lilith Stabs as Babs/Babd
Robyn Griggs as Mandy/Masha
Lisa and Taffy (Nikki McCrea and Sofiya Smirnova) are two nerdy, unpopular girls working at Coventry Lanes. They’re continually picked on by the Rho Rho Rho girls and their Alpha Alpha Alpha frat compatriots. One day, the two Greek groups decide to hold their mixer at the bowling alley, partially because the lanes are the hot hang-out in town and partially to continue hassling their favorite targets. After the sisters and brothers humiliate the duo in front of Lisa’s secret crush, Johnny (Aaron Bernard), the duo head home to clean up. While there, they are contacted by their bosses at the alley (Stevens, Rochon, Best, Stabs, and Griggs). The women claim they can help them get even with their tormentors. All the girls have to do is wish for it… but are any of them ready for the bosses’ true power?
Demon Divas and the Lanes of Damnation is Mike Watt and Amy Lynn Best’s salute to 1980’s scream queen-centric horror comedies. More specifically, as pointed out on-disc by Watt, it’s a combination of the “nerds receive sexy mystical power” angle of 1988’s Nightmare Sisters and the same year’s “Greek life and supernatural hijinks at a bowling alley” film Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama. Both films starred�the era’s biggest scream queens and were goofy comedies with light, not-really-scary horror elements. Watt’s film effectively captures that�same feel though it puts me in a tough position in terms of review. On one side, I get what Watt’s going for, and I really like the film. On the other, just because I understand 
(from listening to the audio commentary) and can give some leeway on some of the movie’s issues doesn’t mean they don’t still hurt the overall project.
In essence,�Demon Divas and the Lanes of Damnation is a textbook example of how to handle hurdles on an indie shoot in such a way as to make a movie as effective as Watt’s. In terms of script, many of the one-liners hit home and enhance the “comedy” aspect of the homage. Taffy’s ditzy side, for instance, could be annoying in another film but works as endearing comedy in this one because she has Lisa to counterbalance her. The Demon Divas themselves are all great performances loaded with outstanding one-liners and set-ups, particularly Stevens, Best, and Rochon. While the former is fantastic in every scene she’s in, the latter two emerge as near-equal talents with great physical comedy and joke delivery. Finally, of course, we can’t forget the three best characters in the film: side characters who I will not spoil because of the weird genius of their roles but will say are fantastically funny and entertaining both in the film and the prequel short on the DVD.
In terms of performances in Demon Divas and the Lanes of Damnation, one has to forgive the not-college-age cast because that’s what we did in the 80s. Lisa and Taffy, as mentioned, have great chemistry and are generally good as the protagonists (though Taffy’s line-readings go awry late). The sorority sisters are also great because they aren’t all mean in the same way. Sure, you have your Queen Bee head of the group, but the others have enough personality to make them memorable in their own right. Finally, the frat brothers, while not as good, still have bright points. The role of Johnny is effective mostly because of how out of place he is. Another has a great comedic scene with the head sorority sister that basically saves his character.
However, as I’ve said, the�Demon Divas and the Lanes of Damnation shoot was plagued with problems, some of which hurt the final product. I commend Watt for the effort in trying to fix the sound in some scenes, but I still have problems hearing characters sometimes. Next, the condensed 8-week to 8-day shoot is painfully obvious. Because of the busy schedules of some of the cast, this leads to a series of jarring scenes with only one character that had to have been filmed at a later point than the one they transition from. The jokes and performances in them are fine, but the shift is distracting. Computer effects are mostly not as well-handled as they could be (particularly in the climactic battle), though practical work is decent.
A series of cast changes in Demon Divas and the Lanes of Damnation also led to the removal of a hallmark of the target subgenre: nudity and sex. While there is strip bowling and a well-done lesbian Jacuzzi scene (never question why a Jacuzzi is in a bowling alley in this subgenre), both are restrained and feel held back from where they were originally intended to go. The ending is also a tough call. I understand that Watt was trying to toy with audience expectations with it, but I couldn’t help wishing it went another way. Finally, and probably the only thing in the film I can’t forgive on any level, is the casting of two male alley employees. While one of the two (credited as “What’s-his-name the Pin Boy”) is actually a decent performance, his cohort, Budnick, is totally pointless, annoying, drags Pin Boy down, and makes far, FAR too recent references for what this is an homage to. I can forgive the actresses having tattoos in an 80s homage (they’re even justified in the story!), but Budnick is just unnecessary.
Overall, for all it has to contend with, Demon Divas and the Lanes of Damnation is still effective as an 80’s scream queen homage. It has appropriate, effective performances and a well-done script that help capture the feel. However, it’s so significantly hampered by behind-the-scenes issues it’s impossible to rate it higher than I am here. I still do recommend a look at the film, though, as a fun blast from the past.
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