Release:
2007 Written and directed by: Pat Higgins
Starring:
James Fisher as Lee Parker Eleanor James as Josephine James Kavaz as Lesley Meadows Rebecca Herod as Nicole Meadows
I settled in to watch Hellbride, an independent
horror creation by Pat Higgins in Great Britain, with no expectations
or preconceptions. There is literally not a single word written about Hellbride
that I have read – a Hellbride virgin as
it were.
The film begins with an ominous-sounding narrator who tells a tale
from over one hundred years ago of a woman scorned by her
fiancé days before her wedding. Instead of breaking-off the
engagement with her cheating man this woman proceeds to the wedding day
where she kills the scoundrel before killing herself. Her wedding ring,
however survives.
The ring lives on to carry a curse that brings death and mayhem to all
who come in contact with it, usually young couples blissfully counting
the days until their own wedding. In every case the wedding does not
take place…because all involved are very dead.
Well, the ring surfaces again in modern England. A young comedian
(James Fisher) finds the ring in a jewelry store and it is the perfect
wedding ring for his bride-to-be, Nichol (Rebecca Herod). Unfortunately
the ring causes Nichol to have nightmares and visions of grotesque
creatures when she puts it on, and it will not come off of her finger.
Can the young couple and their friends learn the secrets of the ring
and of the evil spirit attached to it in time to save the wedding, and
their lives?
Oh, and throw in a mob boss, a dozen henchmen, a séance, a
“kissing cousin” who is also an expert in the
occult and several “Jerry Seinfeld-esque” moments
where the comedian Lee speaks to his audience about what is going on in
his life.
I had to watch Hellbride twice.
As I
watched Hellbride the first time I listened to
the over-the-top creepy voice giving the narration and something was
not quite right. Did he just make a silly joke in the middle of the
dramatic monologue? There were other times during Hellbride,
too, where a bit of goofiness was just kind of “thrown
in”. I chalked it up to British cheek.
Hellbride continued on in a serious manner with
quite a bit of character development and subplot then, there it was
again! Why was that goofy line thrown in for seemingly no reason?
As the end
of Hellbride grew near and the final
confrontation and dramatic crescendo began to swell…all
zaniness broke loose. Then it hit me like a ton of
bricks…this is a comedy! No wonder there were those dorky
one-liners and strange situations…this is a horror comedy.
I had to watch Hellbride again, now knowing that
the goofy antics were not there by accident. I must admit, the quirky
quips were not nearly as annoying in the context of a comedic offering.
So,
now that I have watched Hellbride two times I
find myself in a difficult dilemma. There are really only two possible
explanations as to how I could have sat through over an hour of a movie
before realizing that it is actually supposed to be a comedy. The first
possible answer is that the comedy was not done very well, and Hellbride
suffers from a serious personality disorder, not knowing what it wants
to be…horror, comedy or both. Then, there is the other
possibility…
I
might just be a moron that does not “get” British
humor. My exposure to comedy from across the pond has been primarily
limited to Benny Hill, Monte Python
and a couple of hilarious episodes
of Absolutely Fabulous, after all. Does my simple
mind only understand
pure slapstick? Okay, wait…the final scenes of Hellbride
WERE slapstick… Wow, I’m really messed up.
Hellbride has wonderful acting, great production
quality and a very interesting story, mob-boss subplot included. I may
need to watch it another time or two to decide what I think about the
rest of it. If I am not a moron then the comedy tried too hard and only
ended up making the characters look silly. If I am a moron,
then…well…that’s it. You’re
going to have to watch Hellbride for yourself
because I am too busy drooling. Questions
or comments about Hellbride? Contact us!
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The ring lives on to carry a curse that brings death and mayhem to all
who come in contact with it, usually young couples blissfully counting
the days until their own wedding. In every case the wedding does not
take place…because all involved are very dead.
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