Literally 20 Questions (Part 2 of 2)

by Stephan
(Washington, USA)

11. I just realized something. I don't know if you're a boy or girl. You don't have to answer if you don’t want to. I think most people would assume you’re a guy because they have a fixation that horror fans are nerdy guys living in the dark holes of what they call rooms. But there are very many female horror fans as well. Just curious. Zombie Master: I am, and will always proudly be, a member of the male persuasion of our species.

Other

12. If you could choose to become a zombie or die, what would be your choice (such as the choices in Fido or Land of the Dead). Personally, I would want to roam around as a zombie for a while, then try my hand at being brutally massacred. Zombie Master: I have a long standing rule that if I am bitten by one of these nasties then I am to be shot on the spot, my head then separated from my body, and both burned in separate locations. Not that I am paranoid or anything.

13. Since zombies are reanimated would that mean that the person’s soul would be trapped inside the rotting corpse (if you believe in the afterlife I mean)? Zombie Master: I do believe in an afterlife and I do not believe the soul is trapped. The corpse is running on pure instinct and can perform nothing more than rudimentary thought processes.

14. Do zombies have an expiration date (i.e. if they don't receive sustenance for a long enough period of time or they rot for too long)? Zombie Master: As for waiting them out, I don't think that's possible mainly because even if they do eventually rot out of existence, they can easily pass the infection onto another. I mean, let’s have a scenario: the whole world is infected except for 20 safe houses in the United States. You wait the allotted time for decomposition (lets say three years) and go to see if the others are all right, only to find that one of the groups has recently been infected and you are now vulnerable. You now have to wait another three years hoping that another safe house doesn't fall, realizing that another one will until there are none remaining. The ‘wait it out’ strategy is a bad idea!

15. How is it that Romero went from the idea of voodoo zombie to flesh-eating zombie? I mean there isn't really much of a connection between the two (besides zombie). Zombie Master: Actually, Romero never called his monsters zombies and they were never referred to as zombies in 'Night of the Living Dead'. They were instead called ghouls. Romero started calling them zombies repeatedly beginning with 'Dawn of the Dead' and it stuck. Having defined an entire sub-genre of film, he could call them whatever he wanted to.

16.Do you talk about/discuss the zombie apocalypse with other proclaimed zombie masters on the Internet? Zombie Master: The fact is, before finding this lovely group of folks, I didn't discuss the coming zombie apocalypse with anyone else. There are still some things I won't share here (i.e. the location of my fortress, how many years I am supplied for, where the randomly placed mines are, etc.) Just remember - perfect paranoia is perfect awareness.

17. How does the infection spread to such large numbers? I mean, I can imagine small communities going down but when someone walks towards you with a half-eaten face, isn't your first instinct to run, not to help? Even the idea that it has sheer ability to become so widespread is mind-boggling (I can see quick spread if it was an airborne virus but I've only seen Resident Evil with that little effect). Zombie Master: I don't know if you have noticed or not but the vast majority of the populace are idiots. They are at the grocery store wondering if the apple they have in there hand was irradiated or not. They are on the highways flipping off the guy that they just cut off. They are blaming McDonald's for making them fat instead of maybe eating only one Big Mac instead of three. We are surrounded by them. They are a bunch of sheep that have been lead to believe anything they hear without question. If the government says they have the outbreak under control, these idiots will just mosey on back home and wonder why little Timmy is eating the dog. The only problem I have is that I believe it won't take as long as some models have predicted.

18. Why is it that most zombies can't run? The common answer is that they suffer from rigor mortis or lack the thought process, right? Yet some zombies reanimate before rigor mortis sets in. Zombies act upon basic instinct instead of intellect, similar to animals. But even animals can choose between fast or slow. So why can't zombies run? Zombie Master: Some can run and pretty darn fast. Through many years of research, I believe it has more to do with how recently the body was deceased before reanimation. Those who have been dead for a couple of hours seem to be faster than those who have been dead for a couple of years.

19. Why is it that we never see disabled zombies or zombie children? There are a few movies with children but they don't make impressive roles. You'd think that there would be a lot of them due to their inability to escape the original outbreak. The small size of the children warrants them being able to fit into small places we wouldn't normally think about, and also entails surprise attacks because they're not on eye level. The disabled zombies would probably be comic relief but I've never seen one. I mean, is it that hard to have a zombie crawling on the ground because it can't walk, and its legs mangled in the wheelchair? Or some blind/deaf zombies wandering around trying to find some food? I know it’s a little sick but there needs to be more child and disabled zombies. Zombie Master: There are children zombies in the original 'Dawn of the Dead' and who can forget Karen (Kyra Schon) from 'Night of the Living Dead'? Honestly, I believe that the lack of them in films has more to do with ‘public acceptance’ than anything else. Amazingly, even though we do not have a problem watching zombies eating human flesh and heads being blown away we do have a problem watching a child being put down as one. I believe disabled zombies would fall into this group as well.

20. Finally, I'm thinking of developing a zombie game when I'm older which has several outcomes depending on the choices you make (i.e. you hear a crying baby: do you decide to save it knowing it will attract unwanted attention from zombies? What do you think of this idea? And would you save the baby? Zombie Master: I think it is a good idea and you could definitely have open-ended scenarios that change the play and feel of the game. And if the baby can aim and fire a gun then it can come along. Otherwise, I didn't hear a thing.

Good hunting and aim high,

The Zombie Master