Release:
1984 Written and Directed by: Thom Eberhardt
Starring:
Robert Beltran as Hector Catherine Mary Stewart as Regina Kelli Maroney as Samantha Sharon Farrell as Doris
I am a child of the 80s. To this day I love the music and the
huge hair styles. Not such a fan of the clothes from the period, but
the fond nostalgia remains. Imagine my glee, then, when I discovered Night
of the Comet in the horror section of the local Best Buy.
In the opening scene we meet Regina (Catherine Mary Stewart), a high
school senior that works in the local movie theater. I think that every
80s chick worked in a movie theater, and Regina is no exception. She is
also the queen of the big 80s hair, has that 80s sass and loves the
insanely simple shoot-um-up video games of the era. And she is a slut.
Regina’s
slutty nature is her saving grace in Night
of the Comet. The whole world will be partying in the streets
on this particular night because an ancient comet will pass close
enough to the earth to create the most spectacular light show ever
seen. Regina’s perky sister Samantha (Kelli Maroney) is home
with evil stepmother Doris (Sharon Farrell, who looked a lot like
Cloris Leachman) hosting a street party to welcome the skyward delight,
and nearly every other inhabitant of the planet earth will be joining
them in similar block parties in suburbs world-wide…but
Regina chose to “make it” with the theater film guy
and stay inside and miss it all. Good thing for her.
The
astral revelers had no idea that the gasses from the passing comet,
when coming in contact with living flesh, immediately extract all of
the water from the body and leave nothing but a pile of brown calcium
dust. All that is left of anybody in the comet’s wake is
their hip 80s outfits with power sprinkled around them. Bad trip.
Our
heroic tramp Regina is spared the powdery fate because her
film-room love nest is lined with steel, the one element that affords
protection from the ferocious fumes. Sister Samantha is also spared
because she slept in the steel shed out back to escape the drunken
Doris. There is a third survivor also, a truck driver named Hector
(Robert Beltran of Star Trek: Voyager fame) who evaded disintegration
because he was “making it” with some trollop in his
steel truck trailer.
And the
zombies! It seems that some of the comet’s victims
weren’t fully exposed to the point of becoming dust, but only
partially exposed resulting in their becoming white-eyed zombie-like
freaks. The freak-sightings are few and far between, and they
aren’t really that scary…but it’s always
good to have a zombie-like creature in any movie as far as
I’m concerned.
There are a lot of other things in Night of the Comet
including trips to the shopping mall, conflicts with zombie-commandos,
mad government scientists who hid in fallout shelters during the comet
passing and an 80s-hits radio station playing never-ending pre-taped
programming.
Night
of the Comet is over-the-top cheesy, but
that’s OK. Nothing is taken seriously and the entire movie is
offered in good fun. Night of the Comet is
not scary and doesn’t do a very good job with zombies or
gore, but still I had a great time through the entire film.
Set your expectations low and nostalgia high and Night
of the Comet will deliver in abundance. Be sure and take heed
of the valuable moral of the story in Night of the Comets:
Recreational sex can save you from a powdery demise. Questions
or comments about Night of the Comet?
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