The 5 Worst Hororr Movies Ever

by Ben French
(Kippens, NL, Canada)

5: The Strangers: I watched this movie. It was in fact, one of the scariest horror movies I've ever seen. It just wasn't good. There is little dialogue from the start, a predictable beginning that is supposed to 'leave you hanging', and some of it didn't even make sense. If you want cheap thrills and a load of suspense, by all means watch this movie, I encourage it. But if you want to see a quality film, take this one out of the picture.

4: Amityville II: The Possession: One of the first horror movies I watched, and still one of my personal favorites, is the 2005 remake of The Amityville Horror. After renting this movie, I decided I had to see the original, so I bought the box set, which included the original, the remake, and the sequel. I watched the three of them that night. The original left me disappointed and a bit confused, whereas the remake is what got me started on the horror genre in the first place. Then I watched Amityville II: The Possession and I had almost lost faith in horror for good. Well, that's a bit of an exaggeration, but it is an absolutely horrible movie. Do not watch it.

3: Jennifer's Body: When I first saw the trailers for this movie, I thought: Diablo Cody writing a movie starring Megan Fox as a hot vampire - this is gonna be awesome!' I was sadly mistaken. Megan Fox is the only justifiable reason to watch this movie, and even then it's still not redeemed. Peppered with corny dialogue, which is not how teenagers actually talk, this movie is absolutely horrible.

2: Killer Klowns from Outer Space: I love this movie, and I always will, but the problem is it's not a good horror movie. It can barely even be classified as a horror movie because it lacks any frightening qualities. The only reason it is a horror movie is because of the plot's potential to be scary. The reason that it's instead funny is because it is so poorly made that it makes you laugh. For instance, the plain white beer cans with nothing but the word 'beer' on them, and the retarded clown makeup. I laugh so hard when I see those rapist clowns, I don't care how many people they kill. I advise you, watch this movie, but don't take it seriously. Watch it with a friend for a laugh, or to cheer you up. This movie is not for hardcore horror freaks.

1 The Shining: Yeah, I know what you're thinking, it's somewhere along the lines of: 'What the heck? This movie is a freakin' masterpiece!' I have to disagree. It fails in a few ways for me, and I don't think it would be counted as the worst for me if it weren't for all the hype. But, you see, the movie is dull, lackluster, and almost made me fall sleep. I can honestly say that I wasn't scared, nor did I even feel a little tingle in my stomach. Also, I've read the novel, and I can say that not only didn't the film live up to it's literary predecessor, but it skipped half the story. Between the bad acting (by the whole cast except Nicholson and the little boy, at points) the lack of a first half of the movie, and the overall letdown (between the hype and the excellence of the novel), I'll have to advise you to stick to the novel on this one.