Zombies and Super Strength

by zombie Test Subject
(Middle of Nowhere)

Hey Zombie Master,

People are telling me that my thought on this zombie subject is really stupid and its really pissing me off!

-If zombies are reanimated flesh then their cells would never die and then that means that zombies would have super strength. (see the following explanation)

Zombies are just reanimated flesh which was dead cells brought back to life. That means that no additional tissue that was dead will now come back to life because the dead tissue is now living muscle tissue, so they would have super strength and move super fast!

People say zombies would be slow and that's not true - the rigor mortis would not set in the muscles until they are dead for along time and even then they could still move at a fair rate because of the super strength!

So, my question is: Am I right or should I still be laughed at for being wrong!?

Zombie Test Subject, Middle of Nowhere

Zombie Test Subject,

There is no need to be laughed at or made to feel stupid. Your reasoning makes sense but you are using "deductive reasoning". You are using arguments to move from a given premise, that is assumed to be true, to conclusions, which must be true if the premises are true.
1. Cells that never die denotes super strength.
2. Reanimated flesh contains cells that never die.
3. Zombies have reanimated flesh.
4. Zombies have super strength.
The problem with deductive reasoning is that it is dependent on the premise.

You should be using "inductive reasoning" when testing your hypothesis surrounding the subject of zombies. This type of reasoning seeks truth from a large number of examples.

In other words, your hypothesis is to be commended, but after thorough testing, the hypothesis is not proven by the scores of evidence to the contrary. There are quicker zombies but that does not denote super strength. In fact, the only real evidence that we have of a truly "super-human zombie" is Jason Vorhees as of Part 6.

The simple fact that you are attempting to work out the issues related to the ecology of the zombie shows that you are more than willing to learn and that is the first step in preparing yourself. You will be the one laughing when you are piling up bodies while your "friends" are becoming zombie fodder.

Good hunting and aim high,

The Zombie Master